My only Resolution for 2037 - -

To be one of these sassy broads.

(Thanks to Joe for the photo!)

My brave little buckaroo . . .

While we were walking this morning Noodles was attacked by a Spitz out running around . . . and ended up with a bite on the back of her neck. Poor baby is kind of glum tonight. It doesn't seem to be deep, nor infected, but I'll keep an eye on her and take her to the Vet if she doesn't cheer up.

The Girls hangin' . . .

(Note to self - wash the dog bed cover).

DIANE'S RESOLUTIONS/GOALS FOR 2007, NUMBER 5:

Travel somewhere new.

Sixty-nine and counting . . .

My reading goal for 2006 is 6 books per month, and tonight I started number 69, Bill Bryson's A Walk in the Woods, about his trek along the 2,100 Appalachian Trail. I have already listened to two of his tales - In A Sunburned Country, about his travels in Australia, and A Short History of Nearly Everything, that is, well, just what it says. Bryson delves into the history of the Earth, life, astronomy, biology . . . you name it.

In History, he raised a particularly interesting question. It is without question that the most deadly animal on the planet is not pit bulls, hippos, rattlesnakes or even stingrays, but mosquitos. Through the spread of malaria and other diseases, skeeters kill tens of thousands of people every year. But what blood borne disease do they not spread? AIDS. For now, at least, the AIDS virus does not survive inside the insect to be spread to the next bite victim. But imagine the devastation if the virus mutates to where it CAN survive transmission by mosquito . . .

DIANE'S RESOLUTIONS/GOALS FOR 2007, NUMBER 4:

Improve my Spanish. Yo quiero a hablar Espanol mucho mejor.

Okay, so I think I have identified this bird that I spotted at Bolsa Chica last Friday as an American Kestrel, both by its appearance, and because I watched it hovering over the field as it hunted for prey after it left its perch on this fence.

Its habitat is described as: "Borders of woodlands, farmlands, open fields, pastures with scattered trees, marshes, suburban areas, grasslands, arid plains, deserts with giant cacti, wooded canyons, forest openings. Often seen perched on wires along roads in rural areas. Hunts on the wing, often hovering. Often pumps tail up and down upon landing. Smallest falcon. Common."

Common to whom? It's my best bird watching moment to date, though I was proud of myself for distinguishing between a Great Egret and a Snowy Egret.

TONIGHT ON ABC TV . . . (the following is lifted from an earlier post)

A Charlie Brown Christmas is known for being an innovative animated show, in part, because of its use of a jazz soundtrack, and jazz versions of many holiday classics.

At the time it was first made - in 1964 - the tv execs objected to not only the music, the use of children to voice the characters, and the lack of a laugh track, but the speech by Linus on the true meaning of Christmas, which quotes from the book of Luke:

"And there were in the same country shepherds, abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them! And they were afraid ... And the angel said unto them, "Fear not! For, behold, I bring you tidings o great joy, which shall be to all my people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ, the Lord."

"And this shall be a sign unto you: Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger." And suddenly, there was with the angel a multitude of the Heavenly Host praising God, and saying, "Glory to God in the Highest, and on Earth peace, and good will toward men.""That's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown." - Linus Van Pelt

With the holidays upon us, Linus' wise words should guide us - and should guide me in particular - Peace on Earth, and good will toward men.

It's been 28 years . . . when will she get the hint?

I graduated from High School in 1978, and besides exchanging Holiday cards, I haven't kept in touch much with anyone from my graduating class of nearly a thousand people. Nevertheless, one gal from high school refuses to give up. I have seen her twice in 28 years - at my Ten Year Reunion, and one painful dinner a few years ago. We have nothing in common and all she talks about is people from high school that I don't even remember. So today, I get this email (btw - she sent me her new email address in July) - -

Hi Diane~

I haven't heard from you in ages so I just thought I'd send you a quick e-mail saying hi. How are things going? How's your family doing? I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving. I did. I love the extra time off. I have a new e-mail address. I changed jobs in July and I absolutely love my job here. I wish I had found it 15 years ago. Anyway I hope all is well with you and perhaps we can get together again one day soon.

Take care. Patty

My response - Hi Patty – things are good. Glad to hear you like your new job. Give my best to your Mom and brother. Diane

What I wanted to say - Patty - how can I miss you if you won't go away?

DIANE'S RESOLUTIONS/GOALS FOR 2007, NUMBER 3:

Run a 5k race and a 10k race (not at the same time).

What is your favorite Holiday gift?

When I was a young girl, I used to go fishing with my father and older brother. At first, we would go out on the public boats from the local piers. Eventually, my dad bought an old fishing boat on which we would head out from Dana Point Harbor. My brother and father had their own fishing rods, and we would rent one for me. So, I was thrilled when I received my very own fishing rod for Xmas one year. That was more than 35 years ago, and to this day, it is my favorite Xmas gift ever.

To Bo or not to Bo?

These aren't before and after photos of me, but I do have bad "brow furrows". I found out on Sunday while watching the Bolts beat the Raiders, and eating the best football game food ever, that a gal I know works for Allergan, and can recommend a good doctor for Botox. I have no objections to cosmetic procedures, but am a bit nervous about injecting toxins into my face . . .

Well, we know he has a small penis in addition to being a complete a-hole . . .

"Troy Lee Gentry pleaded guilty Monday to a misdemeanor charge of falsely registering a captive bear as being killed in the wild.
Under the plea, the 39-year-old country singer agreed to pay a $15,000 fine, give up hunting, fishing and trapping in Minnesota for five years, and forfeit both the bear's hide and the bow he used to shoot the animal in 2004. The bear, named 'Cubby,' was killed in a 3-acre private enclosure."

"Lee Marvin Greenly, 46, Gentry's local hunting guide, pleaded guilty at the same hearing to two felony charges of helping other hunters shoot bears at illegal baiting stations he maintained inside a national wildlife refuge near Sandstone in east-central Minnesota. Greenly faces a maximum prison sentence of five years for each count, forfeiture of all-terrain vehicles he and employees used to reach the bait stations, and a maximum fine of $400,000."

"Gentry told the court he bought the bear from Greenly with the understanding they would videotape a hunt inside the bear's enclosure, which was surrounded by an electric fence. 'Lee and I made a deal about harvesting this bear,' Gentry testified. They also agreed to report it was killed in the wild 6 miles east of Sandstone instead of on Greenly's property south of the town."

Seriously, Troy - there are better ways to prove your manhood. Canned hunts are grotesque.

Forget the fine, cover his naked ass in honey and tie him to a tree somewhere deep in the woods.

DIANE'S RESOLUTIONS/GOALS FOR 2007, NUMBER 2:

Create and live within a reasonable budget

If I were a Raiders fan, instead of a Chargers fan . . .

Besides the fact that I would be sharing a one bedroom apartment in Pacoima and working the night shift at AM/PM . . . .

I would be pissed that the officials ruled that Vincent Jackson's celebratory and idiotic spin/spike of the ball was a forward pass, entitling the Bolts to retain possession . . .

But since I am not a Raiders fan, I'll simply accept it as more proof that God (and the NFL) hates the Raiders.

DIANE'S RESOLUTIONS/GOALS FOR 2007, NUMBER 1:

Floss every day.

Today, I went hiking back in the Bolsa Chica Wetlands. I brought my camera, binoculars, and bird identification card, and managed to identify and photograph a few birds.

A trio of adult Brown Pelicans, an endangered species.

An immature Brown Pelican.

Snowy Egrets (black beak, yellow feet).

This is a Great Egret - looking for fish and landing after a short flight (yellow beak and black feet).

This is no ordinary ten dollar bill . . .

This is the ten dollar bill I found while walking Nanners and Noodles this morning. Mere good fortune? I think not. I believe this is God's reward to me for making a concerted effort to get along with my mother yesterday - we don't get along - at all.

So imagine my delight when, after preparing myself for spending a few hours with my mother, she arrived - with her little dog in tow - and announced she was spending the night. I poured myself another glass of wine and resolved to make the best of it. This resolve was put to a test immediately after we sat down to eat, when my mother shared the following with my brother and me:

Mom - "I spoke to your Aunt Catherine this week. She called me after I sent her a picture I'd taken of you two and Emily (my niece). Catherine said 'Diane has really put on a lot of weight, hasn't she?'" (This supposedly coming from a woman who's 2 daughters passed 2 bills in high school and haven't seen the slimmer side of 200 lbs. since then).

Mom - "So I told her - ‘oh yes, Diane has packed on 20 - 30 lbs.’"

Me - (to myself) - "Since when? High School? I'm actually slimmer than I was a couple of years ago."

From then on, my poor brother had to put up with me complaining about my mother - who couldn’t hear a thing since she neglected to put on her hearing aid that morning. ("it really is a lot of trouble to wear it - you two just remember to speak up").

Any whoo - I’m going to use my lucky ten for this week’s football pool and hope God remembers that mom is coming back to stay next weekend . . . .

When worlds collide . . .

I have written before about my 31 year crush on the great Roger Daltrey, and also about my disdain for Marg Helgenberger on CSI. Even so, Roger guest starring on CSI was enough to get me to tune in. Roger played a killer who employed a series of disguises while seeking revenge against 4 schmucks who tried to kill him 30 some years earlier. Sure, Daltrey's british accent would occasionally slip through, but he did a great job in a tricky role, and even sang a karaoke "That's Life". Marg's snarky, overly made-up presence was almost enough to send me diving for the remote, but I managed to make it through. And I hope to see Daltrey in more acting roles . . . maybe next time he'll even sing a karaoke "Love Reign O'er Me".

Happy Thanksgiving!

Last June, I first encountered the whole world of blogging from Bean's Blog. From there, I found la's blog and NFLAdam's blog, both of whom, oddly enough, live within a few miles of me. From there I discovered the blogs of a whole lot of neat folks, and I've very much enjoyed being a part of the blogging community. While it's unlikely I'll ever meet most of you in person, thanks for bringing a lot of entertainment to my life every day. Here's wishing you all, peace, good health, prosperity and lots of interesting ideas for your blogs.

Diane

My birthday just came early . . .

The most laugh out loud funny book I have ever read is David Sedaris' "Me Talk Pretty One Day". His other books and short stories are also gems. Tonight, instead of just deleting my Ticketmaster email update of coming attractions, I checked it out and found that tickets went on sale today for Sedaris' April 26 show at the Riverside Muni Auditorium. First of all, he needs to fire his agent for booking him into this facility, but more importantly, I'll be celebrating my birthday 2 days early in the front row of Mr. Sedaris' southland show. Yee haw!

Check out Sedaris on Letterman here

2006 is nearing an end, and it's time to take stock of the past year . . .

A few years ago, I started making an effort to donate to charities and causes I support, but became quickly discouraged when any donation brought an avalance of solicitations to my door. This year, I have basically thrown out all the solicitations I receive by mail, and instead have kept a list of groups that I support, and have made an effort to donate some small amount every month to at least one of the groups. The recipients are generally groups that benefit animals and the environment. I give to the ALS Association every year in memory of my uncle who suffered from this horrible disease. I also lost a friend to breast cancer this year. The groups that have received donations from me so far this year are:

• Natural Resources Defense Council
• Defenders of Wildlife
• American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals
• Friends of Calakmul
• Seal Beach Animal Care Center
• the LA SPCA
• the Orange County SPCA
• Sierra Club
• the Environmental Defense Fund
• Animal Friends of the Valleys
• Susan G. Komen Foundation
• the ALS Association
• the Avon Breast Cancer Foundation
• AIDS Walk LA
• the World Society for the Protection of Animals
• the National Wildlife Federation
• the Marine Mammal Center
• the Humane Society

Does anyone have any particular charities they support?

In past years, I have also participated in charitable walks to raise money, but have neglected to do so this year. In 2007, I hope to find a way to donate my time and effort, instead of just writing a check . . .

Greater good for the greatest number . . .

One of the books I'm listening to is Robert Ludlum's The Bancroft Strategy, in which maverick U.S. intelligence agent Todd Belknap, known as the Hound for his superior ability to track his quarry, heads to Lebanon to try to find a fellow agent who has been kidnapped. Meanwhile, Andrea Bancroft, a brainy and beautiful hedge-fund analyst who has agreed to serve on the board of her family's mysterious foundation, begins to suspect that behind the Bancroft Foundation's benevolent facade lie sinister conspiracies. Unsurprisingly, those conspiracies intersect with Belknap's search.

Yes, it's a pretty entertaining spy-type thriller, but it raised for me an interesting question . . . the motto of the Bancroft Foundation's shady subsidiary, Theta, is GGGN - the greater good for the greatest number. They use GGGN to justify any means to a benevolent end. Is it ok to blackmail a South American politician who is preventing the implementation of a clean water facility that will aid thousands of individuals? And if that is ok, is it also ok to murder the Belgian diplomat that is holding up international debt forgiveness for many impoverished African nations? GGGN says it is . . . and then where does it stop?

In case you needed even more proof that God hates the Raiders . . .

A state court of appeals has overturned a jury verdict of $34.2 million dollars in favor of the Raiders. The jury had found that the City of Oakland (and others) were negligent in informing the Raiders that the 1995 season was sold out, and that 80 percent of seats for the following season had already been sold, leading to the Raiders entering into a new stadium contract to bring them back to Oakland. The jury rejected the Raiders' $800 million fraud claim. However, the court of appeal found that the Raiders waived any damages arising from the initial agreement when they re-negotiated the contract in 1996, relying on a case precedent decided in 1897.

Justice Rodney Davis disagreed with the other two court of appeal justices, saying: "I am perplexed as to why the the majority feels the need to craft a waiver rule that benefits the alleged defrauder at the expense of the defrauded."

The answer of course is karma. Oh, and the other justices are likely Niners fans.

I'll be cooking Thanksgiving dinner this year . . .

I've managed to talk my mother into driving to my house this year, though I'd say it is 50/50 if she will actually get in the car when it comes down to it. The family Thanksgiving menu is pretty set and I'll be sticking fairly close (with a couple of additions) to the tradition - turkey, stuffing, gravy, mashed potaotes, corn, yams and dinner rolls. I may make a pumpkin pie, but I'll for sure make "Easy Pecan Pie" from the Delta Gamma cookbook. The sorority gave all senior girls a copy - the book must have been put together in the '50s by nice midwestern ladies, and is heavy on jello and casseroles, but it does include a GREAT pecan pie recipe:

1 unbaked pie crust

1 C. dark Karo syrup

1/2 C. sugar

1 1/4 C. melted butter

3 eggs

dash of salt

1 tsp. vanilla

1 C. chopped pecans

Beat eggs well. Add remaining ingredients to eggs. Put mixture in pie crust, and bake slowly in moderate 350 degree oven for 50 to 60 minutes. Nuts will rise to the top and form crust.

I also recommend placing it on a cookie sheet for baking, to keep the oven clean.

The second addition to the menu is green beans with onions and bacon. The basic recipe for this dish is to cut up a few bacon slices, saute until nearly done, then add diced onions and stir until cooked. Add steamed green beans - but here is the twist I learned from Rachel Ray - add a tablespoon of red wine vinegar and a teaspoon of sugar. Stir and cook for another 30 seconds.

The vinegar and sugar add a subtle twist.

I'm off to the grocery store!

After I picked up my ticket yesterday for Casino Royale, I stopped by Barnes & Noble to use the 10 percent off coupon I'd received by email and was ecstatic to find Nature Girl, the latest novel by my favorite subversive writer, Carl Hiaasen. I read his last novel, Skinny Dip in 2004, and since then have read all his books except Striptease (I know he's not to blame for that horrible movie version, but still . . .). Hiaasen turns his anger over the environmental plundering and political corruption of Florida into the funniest books around (except for maybe those of David Sedaris). Long before Florida became a national joke with the 2000 elections, it was being skewered by Hiaasen. I highly recommend any of his books, but Sick Puppy and Skinny Dip are two of my favorites.

p.s. between my frequent reader's discount and the coupon, I bought the book for half price, and God knows I love a bargain!

Bond is back, and better than ever . . .

I played hookie this afternoon, and went to an early showing of Casino Royale. I'm a huge Bond fan, and have been looking forward to Casino Royale. The movie, and Daniel Craig as Bond, have garnered great reviews, which I second. In college I read all the Ian Fleming novels, and this version of Bond is closer to the character created by Fleming. (Timothy Dalton's darker natured version was also closer than those of Connery, Moore and Brosnan). This movie gives the background into the character Bond later becomes, and does so successfully. The gadgets are at a minimum (except for that super duper first aid kit), but the chase scenes and action sequences don't suffer as a result. There is less sex, but more romance, and when Bond gets into a scuffle, he actually emerges with cuts and bruises.

I'm already looking forward to the next film . . . two thumbs up!

Feel like you don't have time to take on a new book?

Then DailyLit.com is your answer! They have lots of books to choose from, and once a book is selected, they email you a segment of the book each day. You can select the delivery time, and the frequency of deliveries. I'm on segment 6 of Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad.

300 channels, and nothing on TV

It seems to me that when I was a kid, and had the prime time choices of ABC, CBS and NBC, there were more tv shows that I watched and enjoyed. Now, there are very few, and I spend many evenings watching old Law & Order reruns. There are a few shows though, that I do try to watch each week.

The big tv night for me is Sunday evening when Midsomer Murders, Dexter, and The Wire are on the Biography Channel, Showtime and HBO, respectively.

Midsomer Murders (pictured) is a British police drama set in the fictional English County of Midsomer. I’ve been renting the old episodes on netflix, and watching those year by year. I’m currently up to 2001, and the Bio channel is showing new episodes on Sunday evenings. I’ve written before about Dexter, and it continues to be very entertaining. The Wire is another of HBO’s gritty series. The corruption and problems of Baltimore are the focus, this season dealing with the inner city schools, drug trade and politics.

My network viewing is mainly limited to Criminal Minds,
The Office, and
Law & Order: Criminal Intent . Criminal Minds is in its second season, and just gets better and better. The show revolves around the FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Unit, which travels the country helping to solve serial killings by profiling the killer. Even after 6 years, I still like the quirky Detective Goren on Criminal Intent, and the Office is the funniest show on network tv.

This rather short list may explain why I’ll meet by 2006 goal of reading 6 books a month . . .

The big man did it! The winner of the Mirror Ball trophy for Dancing with the Stars is the Big Easy, Emmitt Smith!

Now I must repeat 100 times, "I will not watch any more reality tv, I will not watch any more reality tv . . ."

The most fun thing on tv this season?

Emmitt Smith dancing in the freestyle portion of the Dancing with the Stars finals to MC Hammer's Can't Touch This. I voted 20 times for Emmitt (meanwhile the pot of dog stew* was burning . . .), and I really think he deserves to win. His technique is good, but his style and charm are off the charts. Go Emmitt!

*Dog stew - 1 1/4 lbs. ground turkey, 12 oz. can of tuna packed in oil, 6 eggs, 2 lbs. of brown rice, 2 lbs. frozen peas and carrots. Cover in water, and cook for 45 - 60 minutes.

p.s. dog stew is the home made dog food I cook every week for Nanners and Noodles!

Tuesday is an underappreciated day of the week. But for me, it means coming home to a clean house, with my laundry done. You see, my wonderful housekeeper comes on Tuesdays. I came home today, however, to find a house full of feathers - Mourning Dove would be my guess. No head, no beak, no feet, no body, just feathers. I'm actually hoping that Hanna ate the rest, rather than stashing it somewhere in the house to save it for later.

New Recipe - Creamy Cajun Shrimp Linguine - easy and delicious!

1 cup water

1 (14-ounce) can fat-free, less-sodium chicken broth

6 ounces uncooked linguine

1 pound medium shrimp, peeled and deveined

1½ tablespoons butter

1 (8-ounce) package presliced mushrooms

1 large red bell pepper, cut into (¼-inch-thick) slices

2 teaspoons all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon Cajun seasoning

¼ teaspoon salt

2/3 cup half-and-half

¼ cup chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley

Combine the water and broth in a Dutch oven and bring to a boil. Break the pasta in half and add it to the pan. Bring the mixture to a boil. Cover, reduce heat, and simmer for 8 minutes. Add the shrimp to the pan. Cover and simmer 3 minutes or until shrimp are done. Drain the pasta and shrimp. Meanwhile, melt the butter in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Add the mushrooms and pepper to the pan and sauté for 4 minutes or until the moisture evaporates. Add the flour, seasoning, and salt to the pan and sauté for 30 seconds. Stir in the half-and-half and cook 1 minute or until thick, stirring frequently. Remove from heat. Add the pasta mixture and parsley to pan. Toss and enjoy!

Yield: 4 servings, serving size = 1 1/2 cups. Calories 365, fat 10.9g (sat 5.9g), protein 27.4g,carb 38.1g, fiber 2.2g, chol 194mg, sodium 685mg.

[ via Cooking Light magazine, September 2006 ]

Everyone needs a good pal . . .

With the Santa Ana winds this week, the sky was awash with color . . .

In the mean time . . .

My "goals" for this weekend, among other things, are to sew together this cardigan, add the ribbon crochet trim, and finish the book, Ursula Under.

Wilt Chamberlain is known for many things - for being a dominant NBA player, including scoring 100 points in a game, for having played for a year with the Harlem Globetrotters before he became eligible for the NBA, and for claiming to have slept with 20,000 women. My favorite fact about Wilt is that at the time of his death in 1999 at the age of 63, he was learning to play the saxophone. Even as we age, I believe it is important to try to learn new things.

It’s not quite time for New Year’s Resolutions, but I’ve been thinking about setting some personal goals for 2007. These are three ideas I have for something to achieve in 2007:

1. Learn to play a musical instrument - guitar, ukelele or clarinet. I bought a guitar a few years ago, but haven’t learned to play it. The ukelele seems like an easier alternative, and with the clarinet, I’d be prevented from singing along, which is a good thing.

2. Work to improve my golf game. I like to golf, but play mostly on executive 3 and 4 par 9 hole courses, and would like to improve to where I am comfortable on a standard 18 hole course.

3. Become fluent at another language. I speak Spanish well enough to get by while traveling in Costa Rica, but my grammar is atrocious.

With K-Fed's new role as WWE Superstar, Triple H has been relegated to playing bodyguard for Mr. Maddox . . .

And for more stupidity back at home . . . .

Proving my theory about the extra "dumb" gene that some young men seem to carry (and many attorneys, too) . . .

"Two fraternity boys want to make lawsuit against "Borat" over their drunken appearance in the hit movie.

"The legal action filed Thursday on their behalf claims they were duped into appearing in the spoof documentary "Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan," in which they made racist and sexist comments on camera.

"The young men "engaged in behavior that they otherwise would not have engaged in," the lawsuit says. The plaintiffs were not named in the lawsuit "to protect themselves from any additional and unnecessary embarrassment." They were identified in the movie as fraternity members from a South Carolina university, and appeared drunk as they made insulting comments about women and minorities to Cohen's character.

"The lawsuit claims that in October 2005, a production crew took the students to a bar to drink and "loosen up" before participating in what they were told would be a documentary to be shown outside of the United States. "They were induced to agree to participate and were told the name of the fraternity and the name of their school wouldn't be used," said the plaintiffs' attorney, Olivier Taillieu. "They were put into an RV and were made to believe they were picking up Borat the hitchhiker."

"After a bout of heavy drinking, the plaintiffs signed a release form they were told "had something to do with reliability issues with being in the RV," Taillieu said. The film "made plaintiffs the object of ridicule, humiliation, mental anguish and emotional and physical distress, loss of reputation, goodwill and standing in the community," the lawsuit said.

"It names 20th Century Fox, a unit of News Corp., and three production companies as defendants. Studio spokesman Gregg Brilliant said the lawsuit "has no merit." The plaintiffs were seeking an injunction to stop the studio from displaying their image and likeness, along with unspecified monetary damages."

This is what us legal eagles like to refer to as a "frivolous lawsuit". The plaintiffs are upset because they were portrayed as being jackasses? Sorry boys - but truth is an absolute defense . . .

So stupidity is an international phenomenon . . .

"A man was rushed to hospital in Britain with severe internal injuries after trying to launch a powerful firework from his bottom, an ambulance service spokesman said.

"It is thought that the 22-year-old could have been trying to imitate a scene from "Jackass: The Movie", a controversial film featuring a series of edgy pranks. Footage of the incident in Sunderland, north-east England, was captured on a mobile phone by a gang of youths and shows a white flash followed by hysterical laughter and a youth shouting: "Ha ha ha ha," followed by an expletive.

"A spokesman for the North East ambulance service said: "We received a call stating there was a male who had a firework in his bottom and it was bleeding." He is now recovering in a Sunderland hospital after sustaining internal injuries including a scorched colon.

"The incident took place on November 5, when Britons light bonfires and let off fireworks to commemorate a 17th century plot to blow up the Houses of Parliament."

Some where, Guy Fawkes is rolling over in his grave.

Anybody . . . .

How do I link to an old post of mine?

Eagerly awaited by who?

Reclusive pop star Michael Jackson plans a dramatic comeback bid later this month with a performance of his classic song "Thriller," organizers of a music awards ceremony said on Wednesday.

Last month the World Music Awards announced that Jackson would appear in London to accept a Diamond Award that goes to artists who sell more than 100 million records worldwide, and this week they confirmed Jackson's intention to perform.

Besides Jackson's eagerly awaited return, Hollywood actress Lindsay Lohan will host the awards show on November 15, and recording stars Beyonce, Mary J. Blige and Andrea Bocelli are slated to perform. The World Music Awards are based on artists' sales as opposed to votes from the public or a panel of judges.

Wow - what do you do when you receive advance notice of a train wreck? Do you tune in to watch it? I think this will be a disaster of epic proportions . . .

Plant a Tree

A Kenyan environmentalist and Nobel Peace Prize winner called on people around the world to plant 1 billion trees in the next year, saying Wednesday the effort is a way ordinary citizens can fight global warming.

Wangari Maathai, who in 2004 became the first black African woman to win a Nobel in any category, urged participants to ensure the trees thrive long after they are planted.

"It's one thing to plant a tree, it's another to make it survive," said Maathai, who founded Kenya's Green Party in 1987 and focused on planting trees to address the wood fuel crisis here.
Maathai said the campaign is meant to inspire ordinary citizens to help the environment.

"This something that anybody can do," Maathai said Wednesday at the U.N. conference on climate change, which has drawn delegates from more than 100 countries to Kenya.

Do something good today - pick up a piece of trash, plant a tree, recycle a plastic bottle, walk instead of driving . . . . We can make a difference, and we proved that with the elections yesterday.