This is no ordinary ten dollar bill . . .

This is the ten dollar bill I found while walking Nanners and Noodles this morning. Mere good fortune? I think not. I believe this is God's reward to me for making a concerted effort to get along with my mother yesterday - we don't get along - at all.

So imagine my delight when, after preparing myself for spending a few hours with my mother, she arrived - with her little dog in tow - and announced she was spending the night. I poured myself another glass of wine and resolved to make the best of it. This resolve was put to a test immediately after we sat down to eat, when my mother shared the following with my brother and me:

Mom - "I spoke to your Aunt Catherine this week. She called me after I sent her a picture I'd taken of you two and Emily (my niece). Catherine said 'Diane has really put on a lot of weight, hasn't she?'" (This supposedly coming from a woman who's 2 daughters passed 2 bills in high school and haven't seen the slimmer side of 200 lbs. since then).

Mom - "So I told her - ‘oh yes, Diane has packed on 20 - 30 lbs.’"

Me - (to myself) - "Since when? High School? I'm actually slimmer than I was a couple of years ago."

From then on, my poor brother had to put up with me complaining about my mother - who couldn’t hear a thing since she neglected to put on her hearing aid that morning. ("it really is a lot of trouble to wear it - you two just remember to speak up").

Any whoo - I’m going to use my lucky ten for this week’s football pool and hope God remembers that mom is coming back to stay next weekend . . . .